Self-compassion emerged in part from Neffs recognition that when we stumble or fail, we treat ourselves more harshly than we would ever treat friends, family, or even strangers in the same predicament. Thats counterproductive, she has shown. Rather than belittling or berating ourselves during moments of frustration and failure, were better off extending ourselves the same warmth and understanding wed offer another person. Self-compassion begins by replacing searing judgment with basic kindness. It doesnt ignore our screwups or neglect our weaknesses. It simply recognizes that being imperfect, making mistakes, and encountering life difficulties is part of the shared human experience.[15] By normalizing negative experiences, we neutralize them.

The Power of Regret by Daniel H. Pink