Top highlights from The Obstacle Is the Way
“Choose not to be harmed—and you won’t feel harmed. Don’t feel harmed—and you haven’t been.”
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“The obstacle in the path becomes the path. Never forget, within every obstacle is an opportunity to improve our condition.”
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“We forget: In life, it doesn’t matter what happens to you or where you came from. It matters what you do with what happens and what you’ve been given.”
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“Focus on the moment, not the monsters that may or may not be up ahead.”
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“Wherever we are, whatever we’re doing and herever we are going, we owe it to ourselves, to our art, to the world to do it well.”
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“Where the head goes, the body follows. Perception precedes action. Right action follows the right perspective.”
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“For all species other than us humans, things just are what they are. Our problem is that we’re always trying to figure out what things mean—why things are the way they are. As though the why matters. Emerson put it best: “We cannot spend the day in explanation.” Don’t waste time on false constructs.”
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“The only guarantee, ever, is that things will go wrong. The only thing we can use to mitigate this is anticipation. Because the only variable we control completely is ourselves.”
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“It’s okay to be discouraged. It’s not okay to quit. To know you want to quit but to plant your feet and keep inching closer until you take the impenetrable fortress you’ve decided to lay siege to in your own life—that’s persistence.”
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“Andrew Carnegie famously put it. There’s nothing shameful about sweeping. It’s just another opportunity to excel—and to learn. But you, you’re so busy thinking about the future, you don’t take any pride in the tasks you’re given right now. You just phone it all in, cash your paycheck, and dream of some higher station in life. Or you think, This is just a job, it isn’t who I am, it doesn’t matter. Foolishness. Everything we do matters—whether it’s making smoothies while you save up money or studying for the bar—even after you already achieved the success you sought.”
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“In life our first job is this, to divide and distinguish things into two categories: externals I cannot control, but the choices I make with regard to them I do control. Where will I find good and bad? In me, in my choices. —EPICTETUS”
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“We’ve all done it. Said: “I am so [overwhelmed, tired, stressed, busy, blocked, outmatched].” And then what do we do about it? Go out and party. Or treat ourselves. Or sleep in. Or wait. It feels better to ignore or pretend. But you know deep down that that isn’t going to truly make it any better. You’ve got to act. And you’ve got to start now.”
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“In every situation, life is asking us a question, and our actions are the answer.”
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“Failure shows us the way—by showing us what isn’t the way.”
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“You know what’s better than building things up in your imagination? Building things up in real life.”
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“Remember that this moment is not your life, it’s just a moment in your life. Focus on what is in front of you, right now. Ignore what it “represents” or it “means” or “why it happened to you.”
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“To argue, to complain, or worse, to just give up, these are choices. Choices that more often than not, do nothing to get us across the finish line.”
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“What such a man needs is not courage but nerve control, cool headedness. This he can get only by practice. —THEODORE ROOSEVELT”
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“Each time, you’ll learn something. Each time, you’ll develop strength, wisdom, and perspective. Each time, a little more of the competition falls away. Until all that is left is you: the best version of you.”
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“Stop looking for an epiphany, and start looking for weak points. Stop looking for angels, and start looking for angles.”
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“To prevent becoming overwhelmed by the world around us, we must, as the ancients practiced, learn how to limit our passions and their control over our lives. It takes skill and discipline to bat away the pests of bad perceptions, to separate reliable signals from deceptive ones, to filter out prejudice, expectation, and fear. But it’s worth it, for what’s left is truth. While others are excited or afraid, we will remain calm and imperturbable. We will see things simply and straightforwardly, as they truly are—neither good nor bad.”
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“Blessings and burdens are not mutually exclusive.”
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“Would you have a great empire? Rule over yourself. —PUBLIUS SYRUS”
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“Failure really can be an asset if what you’re trying to do is improve, learn, or do something new.”
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“Man does not simply exist but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become the next moment. By the same token, every human being has the freedom to change at any instant. —VIKTOR FRANKL”
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“All great victories, be they in politics, business, art, or seduction, involved resolving vexing problems with a potent cocktail of creativity, focus, and daring. When you have a goal, obstacles are actually teaching you how to get where you want to go—carving you a path. “The Things which hurt,” Benjamin Franklin wrote, “instruct.”
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“We must all either wear out or rust out, every one of us. My choice is to wear out. —THEODORE ROOSEVELT”
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“What is defeat? Nothing but education; nothing but the first steps to something better. —WENDELL PHILLIPS”
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“Persist and resist". Persist in your efforts. Resist giving into distraction, discouragement, and disorder. - Epictetus”
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“In its own way, the most harmful dragon we chase is the one that makes us think we can change things that are simply not ours to change. That someone decided not to fund your company, this isn’t up to you. But the decision to refine and improve your pitch? That is. That someone stole your idea or got to it first? No. To pivot, improve it, or fight for what’s yours? Yes.”
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“When people ask where we are, what we’re doing, how that “situation” is coming along, the answer should be clear: We’re working on it. We’re getting closer. When setbacks come, we respond by working twice as hard.”
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“How we interpret the events in our lives, our perspective, is the framework for our forthcoming response—whether there will even be one or whether we’ll just lie there and take it. Where the head goes, the body follows. Perception precedes action. Right action follows the right perspective.”
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“On the path to successful action, we will fail—possibly many times. And that’s okay. It can be a good thing, even. Action and failure are two sides of the same coin. One doesn’t come without the other. What breaks this critical connection down is when people stop acting—because they’ve taken failure the wrong way.”
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“Uncertainty and fear are relieved by authority. Training is authority.”
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“Vires acquirit eundo (We gather strength as we go).”
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“You’ll have far better luck toughening yourself up than you ever will trying to take the teeth out of a world that is—at best—indifferent to your existence.”
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“What matters most is not what these obstacles are but how we see them, how we react to them, and whether we keep our composure.”
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“When we aim high, pressure and stress obligingly come along for the ride. Stuff is going to happen that catches us off guard, threatens or scares us. Surprises (unpleasant ones, mostly) are almost guaranteed. The risk of being overwhelmed is always there. In these situations, talent is not the most sought-after characteristic. Grace and poise are, because these two attributes precede the opportunity to deploy any other skill. We must possess, as Voltaire once explained about the secret to the great military success of the first Duke of Marlborough, that "tranquil courage in the midst of tumult and serenity of soul in danger, which the English call a cool head.”
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“The Greeks had a word for this: apatheia. It's the kind of calm equanimity that comes with the absence of irrational or extreme emotions. Not the loss of feeling altogether, just the loss of the harmful, unhelpful kind. Don't let the negativity in, don't let those emotions even get started. Just say: No, thank you. I can't afford to panic.”
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“See things for what they are. Do what we can. Endure and bear what we must. What blocked the path now is a path. What once impeded action advances action. The Obstacle is the Way.”
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“People turn shit into sugar all the time—shit that’s a lot worse than whatever we’re dealing with. I’m talking physical disabilities, racial discrimination, battles against overwhelmingly superior armies. But those people didn’t quit. They didn’t feel sorry for themselves. They didn’t delude themselves with fantasies about easy solutions. They focused on the one thing that mattered: applying themselves with gusto and creativity.”
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“Perspective has two definitions. Context: a sense of the larger picture of the world, not just what is immediately in front of us Framing: an individual’s unique way of looking at the world, a way that interprets its events”
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“Discipline in perception lets you clearly see the advantage and the proper course of action in every situation—without the pestilence of panic or fear.”
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“But thinking about and being aware of our mortality creates real perspective and urgency. It doesn’t need to be depressing. Because it’s invigorating.”
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“Our perceptions are the thing that we’re in complete control of.”
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“The struggle against an obstacle inevitably propels the fighter to a new level of functioning. The extent of the struggle determines the extent of the growth. The obstacle is an advantage, not adversity. The enemy is any perception that prevents us from seeing this.”
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“Where one person sees a crisis, another can see opportunity. Where one is blinded by success, another sees reality with ruthless objectivity. Where one loses control of emotions, another can remain calm. Desperation, despair, fear, powerlessness—these reactions are functions of our perceptions. You must realize: Nothing makes us feel this way; we choose to give in to such feelings.”
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“Our perceptions determine, to an incredibly large degree, what we are and are not capable of. In many ways, they determine reality itself. When we believe in the obstacle more than in the goal, which will inevitably triumph?”
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“You will come across obstacles in life—fair and unfair. And you will discover, time and time again, that what matters most is not what these obstacles are but how we see them, how we react to them, and whether we keep our composure.”
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“There is always a countermove, always an escape or way through. No one said it would be easy and of course the stakes are high, but the path is there for those ready to take it.”
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“In life, it doesn’t matter what happens to you or where you came from. It matters what you do with what happens and what you’ve been given. And the only way you’ll do something spectacular is by using it all to your advantage.”
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“Bad companies are destroyed by crisis. Good companies survive them. Great companies are improved by them.”
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“While others obsess with observing the rules, we’re subtly undermining them and subverting them to our advantage.”
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“Seize this moment to deploy the plan that has long sat dormant in your head.”
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“Nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so,” as Shakespeare put it.”
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“An entrepreneur is someone with faith in their ability to make something where there was nothing before. To them, the idea that no one has ever done this or that is a good thing.”
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# The Obstacle is the Way
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I. Perception
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II. Action
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III. Will
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- The Discipline of Perception
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We have a choice on how we respond to a situation, can we turn it into a positive? Be objective, control emotions, choose to see the good in situations, place things in perspective, ignore what disturbs or limits others, focus on what can be controlled
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- Recognize your Power
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- Steady your Nerves
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- Control your Emotions
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Panic leads to mistakes, it forces you to override system. Panic can even benefit us as a form of procrastination. **If an emotion cannot change the condition or the situation you are dealing with then it is likely an unhelpful emotion.** Ask yourself —> *Do I need to freak out about this?* Apathy = calm equanimity that comes with the absence of irrational or extreme emotions
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Perception vs Observation. Perceptions are the problem. *How often do we see what we think is there instead of what is actually there?* Picture someone in their underwear
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- ALTER YOUR PERSPECTIVE
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*Perspective is everything*. We often choose the ominous explanation over the simple one. Take what you are afraid of and break it apart
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- IS IT UP TO YOU
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- *“In life our first job is this, to divide and distinguish things into two categories: externals I cannot control, but the choices I make with regard to them I do control. Where will I find good and bad? In me, in my choices.” —EPICTETUS*. Focusing what is in our power magnifies and enhances our power, but every ounce of energy directed at things we cannot actually influence is wasted.
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Deal with the current moment. The more we deal with NOW the easier the obstacle is to complete. We shouldn’t tolerate people who don’t believe in their own abilities to succeed. **Our best ideas come from obstacles bc we have no other choice.**
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- THINK DIFFERENTLY
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"*There shall be no Alps" - Napoleon*. So many people in our lives have preached the need to be realistic or conservative or worse - to not rock the boat. **This is an enormous disadvantage when it comes to trying big things bc while our doubts (and self doubts) feel real, they have very little bearing on what is and isn't possible.**
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- FINDING THE OPPORTUNITY
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Don't be overwhelmed by obstacles, look at the opportunity w/in it. "when people are rude or disprespectful - They underestimate us | conniving - we wont have to apologize when we make an example of them | critical or question our abilities - lower expectations are easier to exceed | lazy - makes whatever we accomplish seem all the more admirable
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- PREPARE TO ACT
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- THE DISCIPLINE OF ACTION
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When our worst instincts are in control we dally. In life, it doesn't matter your obstacle, all that matters is where you want to go and if you can accomplish it. We have an obstacle we need to lean into and control.
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We always greet our obstacles: with *energy, persistence, coherent and deliberate process, iteration and resilience, pragmatism, strategic vision, craftiness and savvy, eye for opportunity and pivotal moments*
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- GET MOVING
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**If you want momentum you have to get up and create it yourself. Then stay moving!**
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- PRACTICE PERSISTENCE
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Not to be stopped by failure. Slow, deliberate, persistence. Epictetus: “Persist and resist.” It is supposed to be hard, and your first attempts will not work.
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- ITERATE
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Failure is part of the learning process. “There is a saying that the Irish ship captain found all the rocks in the harbors - using the bottom of his boat”
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- FOLLOW THE PROCESS
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If you have to do something difficult don’t focus on that,instead break it down into pieces. Simply do what you need to do right now. When it comes to our actions, disorder and distraction are death. The unordered mind loses track of what’s in front of it gets distracted by thoughts of the future. Small deliberate actions: bite by bite. Focus on the NOW.
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- DO YOUR JOB DO IT RIGHT
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Always do things the right way. Don’t assume they are above you.
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